Billie Lourd has shared an emotional tribute to her late mother, Carrie Fisher, on the eighth anniversary of her passing. The actress expressed a mix of feelings, describing herself as “grief but grateful” as she navigated the painful day. Lourd took to Instagram on December 27, 2024, posting a heartfelt message alongside a nostalgic photo of her with Fisher.
Lourd, 32, explained her complex emotions surrounding the anniversary, admitting that she dreads the day every year. “I always dread this day. I spend so much time leading up to it thinking about how awful I’m going to feel,” she wrote. Despite her initial feelings of dread, Lourd revealed that the arrival of her children helped shift her mood. “When my kids woke up, the dark cloud dissipated,” she shared, likening the day’s emotions to a “tropical storm” that alternates between sorrow and light.
Drawing inspiration from Anne Lamott’s quote about grief, Lourd described it as “like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly,” acknowledging that the pain remains, but she has learned to adapt. “I may have a limp, but I am absolutely dancing through life,” she reflected. Lourd expressed how her grief has deepened her appreciation for life’s small moments, making her “griefful” — a blend of grief and gratitude.
The actress also mentioned how her two children, Kingston and Jackson, have brought joy into her life, with her late mother’s spirit present in the magic of their moments. Lourd spoke of the coexistence of conflicting emotions, from grief to joy, and sent love to others who may be struggling.
Carrie Fisher passed away on December 27, 2016, at the age of 60 due to a heart attack. Just one day later, Fisher’s mother, Debbie Reynolds, also passed away from a stroke at 84. Since then, Lourd has openly discussed the profound loss of both her mother and grandmother.
Reflecting on past anniversaries, Lourd previously described her grief as a shifting experience. In 2023, she wrote, “Every anniversary brings a different iteration of my grief,” noting how each year brings a mix of emotions, from anger to emptiness. She has often acknowledged the complex nature of mourning, recognizing that grief can’t be neatly categorized.
In 2021, Lourd also shared her thoughts on the fluctuating stages of grief. “My grief is a multi-course meal with many complicated ingredients,” she explained, emphasizing the unpredictable nature of loss. “There is no ‘should’ in grief,” she concluded, reinforcing the idea that grief is personal and can manifest in various ways.
Through all her reflections, Billie Lourd continues to honor her mother’s memory while dealing with the complexities of her own grief journey.
